Friday 3rd August 2012
JOBS – according to the decrees of Money, the unelected ruler of the Known Universe – are what we must have in order to:
a) be happy
b) make a worthwhile contribution to the economic growth of the nation
c) satisfy an inner desire to serve others
d) not be seen by our friends and relatives as work-shy
e) earn money, which allows us buy lots of things to make us happy
f) have a bit left over at the end of the week, which allows us to buy lottery tickets in the hope that we can suddenly become rich.
Being rich is the ultimate goal, because it allows you to be happy without all the palaver of having to have a job.
An awful lot of jobs are unpaid. This is because they are thought to be fulfilling per se: parenting, washing-up, gardening, going to the Post Office, shopping etc. – unless you’re rich, of course, in which case you might as well pay somebody to do these tasks for you.
Applying for jobs is another example of an unpaid job. It would be considered ludicrous if job applicants expected to be remunerated for spending hours of their own time filling in forms and re-writing their CVs to fit job descriptions.
Besides, how many person-hours are already being wasted by (paid) experts in ‘human resources’ having to sift through countless forms and CVs? No wonder they don’t have the time to acknowledge applications, let alone send polite replies informing applicants they have not been offered an interview.
I met a personable young man in town the other day, conducting a survey on behalf of a local funeral director: his first ‘job’ since leaving university with a first class honours degree in History.
“Better than stacking shelves?”
“Not sure. I’ll try anything. I need experience, but how do you get experience without first getting a job?”
You can’t tell what a person’s like from reading a CV. Had I been rich, I’d have offered him a job on the spot, but perhaps I should have asked if he was earning enough to have a bit left over at the end of the week to buy a lottery ticket…